TITLE: DEFINING TERRITORY AUTHOR: DONNILEE E-MAIL: DONNILEE@SNET.NET RATING: NC-17 CATEGORY: SK/O, F/O SPOILERS: Requiem, This is Not Happening, Within, Without, Existence KEYWORDS: Rape and violence. SUMMARY: Skinner and Follmer fight over the best Administrative Assistant in the Bureau, causing some unsavory information to be uncovered about Kimberly's new boss. WARNING: There are portions of a past rape described in this fic through flashback. (Skinner is not involved.) If you are squeamish about that sort of thing or have personal issues in that area, please consider reading something else. I don't wish to upset anyone who has had this horrible type of experience. All horizontal monkey business between Skinner and Kim is consensual and loving. DISLCLAIMER: I've been possessed by the devil who takes over my body and makes me write all these perverted things. Oh! You mean the characters? What was that? Copyright, you say? All X- Files characters belong to Chris Carter, Ten Thirteen Productions and Fox Broadcasting. No copyright infringement intended and not a stinking dime is made from this enterprise! THANKS: To my beta reader, FatCat, for once again fixing all my boo-boos, and preventing me from sounding stupid! XXXXXXXXXX PART 1 (PG-13) FBI HEADQUARTERS HOOVER BUILDING WASHINGTON, D.C. A.D. SKINNER'S OFFICE FRIDAY - 2:00 PM "Follmer, you're just being petty!" I growled. I was pissed off. "She's a good Administrative Assistant." He shrugged. "I have seniority, I made the request. She's mine. It's that simple. It's Deputy Director Follmer to you, Skinner." "Then it's A.D. Skinner to you, weasel." "Watch yourself, Skinner. I outrank you now." "Hmmm, yeah and you're just drunk on that, aren't you?" Follmer sneered at me. I wanted to punch him right in the mouth and knock that self-satisfied grin off his face. He thought he was such a dapper yuppie. He made me sick. How the hell he got to be Deputy Director, I'd never know. He must have something on someone in a position of power. The man wasn't competent for the job. He made no secret of his ambition. I knew he would always be furthering his own agenda. What that agenda was would remain a mystery for now. I vowed, however, to do a little snooping on D.D. Follmer to find out what I could get on him. It couldn't hurt to have some leverage on this slime ball. "You're just jealous, Skinner. You wanted the D.D. position, and the Director chose me." "I'm not jealous, Follmer. It'll be a cold day in hell before I want anything you have." Follmer huffed. "Oh yeah? I think we both know that's not the truth. I have Kim now. See that she reports to me on Monday." He walked out without a by-your-leave and I slammed the door behind him. I took a deep breath, counted to ten, and opened the door again. Kim was staring at it as though it were going to explode. If I'd slammed it any harder, it might have. "Could you come in here, Kim?" I said brusquely. "Certainly, Sir," she said hesitantly. I'd obviously frightened her with my less than professional behavior. She was used to my growling, but slamming doors was beneath me. "I'm sorry I slammed the door," I said as she whisked by me with a pad and pencil in her hand. "You won't need those," I said, realizing she thought I was calling her in for dictation. "Oh, O.K.," she said tentatively, setting them down on the front of my desk as she took a seat in the chair. I returned to my chair and sat down. "How long have we been together, Kim?" "Ummm, a bit over seven years, Sir." I cleared my throat, feeling emotional all of a sudden and I didn't like it. "I have some bad news." XXXXXXXXXX I hung my head as she left the office quietly. She appeared contemplative but I knew she was upset. I'd told her to call me at home over the weekend if she had any questions or just wanted to talk. I'd explained that this was not my decision. Follmer had gone over my head. He was stealing my Administrative Assistant from me. He was still pissed off about Monica Reyes choosing me for her superior when she'd had the chance. I wondered what she'd ever seen in him. Yes, I knew they'd had a relationship at some point in the past. It was clear to me now that it was long over and she was bunking with John Doggett. There must be something in the water in the X-Files office. It turned all the agents into lovers. I picked up the phone and dialed the extension for the X-Files office. It was after 5:00 PM, but I knew they were probably still there. It only rang twice before Monica answered. "Agent Reyes, please come up to my office." [We'll be right up.] "Just you, Agent." [Oh!] she said, surprised. [All right, then. I'm on my way.] I hung up and waited for her to appear. She entered the office, watching me carefully as she sat down in one of the chairs. She'd closed the door on her way in. "You wanted to see me, Sir?" "Yes. I have some questions to ask you. They are ... perhaps not traditional, and perhaps they aren't even ethical, but I still need to ask them." She looked guarded now. "Concerning what, Sir?" I suddenly realized that she was afraid I knew about her and John and was going to question her on it. I decided to surprise her. "It's not about your relationship with Agent Doggett," I amended reassuringly. She gasped. "Oh shit," she muttered under her breath. I smiled at her and she looked wonderfully confused. "You know about us?" "I'm not blind, Agent. However, unlike some of my colleagues, I've never been concerned about Agents getting involved as long as it doesn't affect their work. I haven't seen your work suffer and see no need to make an issue of it." "It won't, Sir. I promise. We're very careful to keep things outside the office." "See that you do," I said. "That's not what I called you up here for, though." She visibly relaxed after receiving my blessing on her personal relationship with John Doggett. She was a good-looking woman, I'd give her that. But she wasn't my type. I tended to like light- haired, petite women, like Agent Scully ... or Kimberly for instance. 'Now where did that thought come from?' I wondered. Probably because I was losing her, I reasoned. "You can refuse to answer, Monica. I want to say that up front, but I need to ask." "Yes, Sir." "Tell me everything you know about Brad Follmer. What are his strengths? What are his weaknesses? Who are his friends? Where did he grow up ... everything." She looked down, obviously surprised by the question. Finally she said, "May I inquire why you are asking?" "I'd rather you didn't." "The less I know the better?" she asked, now looking amused. "Something like that." I met and held her gaze. "I'm asking you to trust me, Monica. I need to know everything I can about the man but I don't want to raise any flags, if you know what I mean." "I do, Sir." "You also couldn't tell anyone that I asked you about this." "What about John?" "Only if you swear him to secrecy." "He won't tell. He hates Brad." "I imagine he does," I said, grinning at her. She blushed. "Brad was a mistake for me. I can't stand him either." "Will you help me and trust that I don't have a nefarious purpose for asking?" She nodded. "Got a pen?" I smiled. "I'll owe you, Agent Reyes." "Oh, that could be fun." "Don't push it," I teased. She smiled and started to talk. XXXXXXXXXX Mulder was gone. I still couldn't believe it. One minute he'd been right next to me and the next he was gone, vanished in a beam of light. Weirdest thing I'd ever seen. He'd left behind a pregnant Scully, distraught over his disappearance and elated over her pregnancy, by turns. I felt so bad for her. She never said the baby was his, but I knew it was. Comments like, 'I wish Mulder wasn't going to miss this pregnancy,' pretty much cinched it for me. I knew they'd tried IVF once and it had failed so I could only assume that this had happened the old fashioned way. I hadn't known they were involved. I was one of the few people that didn't think they were. Apparently, I'd been wrong. I felt responsible. He'd left her behind for her own safety. She'd entrusted him to me, to keep an eye on him. I had failed her miserably. I groaned internally remembering all the times I'd reprimanded her, saying things like, 'You were supposed to be watching him, Agent Scully,' or 'I count on you to keep him out of trouble.' I was realizing now just how stupid those comments had been. No one kept Mulder out of trouble if he wanted to step into it. I'd set her an impossible task, then taken it on myself, and now I was eating crow. I always thought myself capable of getting what I wanted and holding on to what I had. Apparently, I couldn't even hold onto my own Administrative Assistant, let alone my rogue agent. I sighed and decided I wasn't going to get any more work done tonight. I was going to have to call for a temporary from the secretarial pool on Monday. That would suck. Kim was so reliable and so proficient at her job. She would be nearly impossible to replace. More than that, though, I trusted her. That was a rare quality. It didn't matter how sensitive the information was I dealt with, she was a clam about it. She never breathed a word of my dealings and maneuverings outside of the system. I knew she was aware of them. How could she not be with the parade of low life's coming in and out of my office; Cigarette Smoking Bastard and Krycek among others. I'd taken Kim for granted. I realized that now. I needed to get her a gift to show my appreciation for her working for me all these years. Maybe I would even take her out to lunch. XXXXXXXXXX WALTER SKINNER'S APARTMENT COLUMBIA HEIGHTS APARTMENTS 815 S GREENBRIER STREET ARLINGTON, VA 22204 SUNDAY 11:00 AM "Kim, it's Walter Skinner," I said into the phone. "Oh! Hi, Sir." "Have you eaten lunch, Kim?" "No, I haven't. Why?" "I was wondering if you would meet me for lunch. I'd like to discuss some things with you outside the office." "Oh, well, sure. You know what? Why don't you just come over? I'll whip something up." "Are you sure?" "Absolutely. You know where I live?" "In Georgetown, but give me the address again." XXXXXXXXXX KIM COOK'S APARTMENT ALBAN TOWERS 3700 MASSACHUSETTS AVENUE, NW WASHINGTON, DC 20016 I knocked on the door and she let me in. I smiled at her. She looked great. I realized I'd never once, in seven years, seen her in casual clothes. She was wearing well-worn jeans that hugged her in all the right places. On top she had a loose yellow tank top. Her snow-white arms were covered with freckles. She was wearing a barrette in her hair, pulling the sides back to meet at the back of her head. One bang was falling across her forehead. She wasn't wearing make-up either and I noticed an attractive sprinkling of freckles across the bridge of her nose and over her cheeks. "Hey there," I said, feeling odd seeing her like this in her own home on a weekend. "Come in, have a seat," she said. She was frankly appraising me as well. I'd worn a oxford shirt and khakis with loafers. I was suddenly self- conscious about the hair sticking out the top of my unbuttoned shirt as she raked her eyes over my chest. She smiled and said, "Make yourself comfortable. I'm almost done in here." Then she turned and made her way back into the kitchen. From there she hollered, "What would you like to drink?" "What have you got?" "Ginger Ale, Coke, Seltzer, Iced Tea, Orange Juice, Milk, Coffee ..." "Whoa!" I cut her off, chuckling. Iced Tea would be great." She emerged seconds later with a large glass of iced tea. I took it from her and she smiled. "I made a tuna casserole. It will be done in a few minutes. It's in the oven." "Mmm," I hummed, taking a drink of my iced tea. I set it down. "Sounds good." She laughed. "You don't get out much, do you?" she teased, sitting down on the opposite end of the couch. I laughed. "No, not particularly." "You should. You need to relax more." "Is that your medical opinion, Dr. Cook?" I shot back. She smiled. "Female instinct," she said, waggling her eyebrows. I grinned at her. I liked this Kim, relaxed in casual clothes, hanging out in her apartment on a Sunday afternoon, making tuna casseroles. I wondered what she did for fun. I'd have to ask her sometime, but that wasn't what I was there for. "Kim, I wanted to tell you I'm not happy about your transfer." "Oh, I know that, Sir. I'm not happy about it either." I looked at her. "I'm going to try and get you back." She raised an eyebrow, but then a timer went off in the kitchen. "Be right back," she said. "Hold that thought." She leaped up off the couch with consummate grace and ran into the kitchen. I found my eyes tracking the movement of her firm ass cheeks under her well- worn jeans and shook myself internally. What the hell was I doing? She returned a moment later and said, "Come on in the kitchen. Easier to eat in here." I got up, grabbed my drink and went in, sitting at the small table she had there. "Can I help?" I offered. "Nope, just eat." She set the pan down on a trivet and handed me a plate and silverware. She dished up our food and sat back. We ate in silence for a few minutes, me humming with pleasure at this simple home cooked meal while she looked on with an extremely amused expression on her face. Maybe tuna casserole was no big deal to her, but I rarely got home cooked food, even simple fare like this and it was hitting the spot. "It's delicious, Kim. Thank you for inviting me." "You're welcome. It's nothing. You definitely need to get out more." I chuffed and continued eating. She prompted me, "So you were saying?" "Huh?" "Earlier, about trying to get me back. I haven't even left yet." "You have to report to him on Monday." "I know." "Then you're gone, for all intents and purposes. I'm pissed off at Follmer. How much do you know about office water cooler talk?" She grinned. "Quite a bit." "You know about the relationship in the past between Agent Reyes and D.D. Follmer?" "I heard that rumor. I didn't know if it was true." "It was true. She hates him now though." "She's better off with Doggett anyway. He's a good man, if a little rough around the edges," she replied. Ahh, so she knew about that too. I don't know why I was surprised. She probably observed more things in that building than anyone suspected. She tended to be quiet and fade into the woodwork. I think people even forgot she was there sometimes because she could be so discreet. "Yes, she is," I said finally. "What's on your mind, Sir?" "Call me Walter when we're not at work. I feel funny hearing you call me Sir, in your own home." She smiled. "All right, Walter. Cut to the chase. Why did you really come here?" She was nothing if not direct. "I talked to Monica Reyes on Friday. She's sworn to secrecy, but she gave me some interesting information on Follmer." "Oh yeah? You thinking of blackmailing him?" she asked casually. I nearly choked on my food, and she jumped up, coming back holding some more napkins. She was grinning. "Why would you think that?" "I'm not as na=EFve as I look," she said calmly. "Blackmail is a harsh word," I dodged. "Yes, it is, but I see you're not denying it." "I don't want to blackmail him, necessarily. I'd just like to have something on him, in the bank, so to speak. Then if he tried anything really slimy, I could have a trump card up my sleeve." "Did Agent Reyes give you your trump card?" "She might have. She told me what finally ended their relationship." "I feel a bomb about to be dropped," she said liltingly, smiling at me. I returned the smile. "Might be. She said she caught him with a younger woman, a MUCH younger woman. She didn't say it outright, but implied that the girl was underage." "That would suck royally," she said in a deadpan voice. I laughed at her delivery again. "Yeah, well, she was well rid of him. But the interesting thing was that when she told his best friend what he'd done, cheating on her and all, the friend said that he knew it was just a matter of time. When she asked what he meant by that, he'd told her, that he was a borderline pedophile. He'd always had a thing for really young, barely developed girls." "Yuck," Kim said, all her humor gone now. She was frowning as she pushed her plate away. "Yeah, yuck. According to Monica, she's had no reason to think that's changed, although he's very discreet about it. She thinks he occasionally dates older women to cover this up. She also believes that she was one of those women he used. According to her, he likes to have power and control over his women. She didn't fit into that mold as you can imagine, so they had problems even before she caught him cheating on her. This information is unsubstantiated, so I guess I don't have to tell you to keep it to yourself." "No, you don't. I keep everything to myself." "I know you do, Kim. That's why I trust you so much and I'm so sorry to lose you. I hate the thought of you working for that weasel." Her eyes became bright with wetness but no tears fell. "Thank you, Sir." "Walter, remember?" "Right. Walter. So, Walter, what do you want me to do about it?" "About what?" She rolled her eyes. "About this information." "I don't know that I want you to do anything with it. I just wanted ..." "To tell someone?" she suggested. I looked at her. "Yeah, someone I could trust. More than that though, I wanted you to be aware of what a sleaze bag he is and watch your back." "I know what kind of man he is without being told." "I know. You're very perceptive." "Don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure him out. He thinks entirely too much of himself. Then again, that's an occupational hazard for men in positions of authority." I raised my eyebrows at her. She smiled. "Present company excluded, of course." "Oh, of course!" I replied, taking her teasing without getting angry and wondering about that. She was so easy to talk to, so easy to be with. My eyes traveled down her bare arms and she looked away, uncomfortable with my scrutiny. "So what now?" "Now, I try to find out all I can about Brad Follmer and find a reason to request you back in my office. I'm trying to come up with a valid excuse; confidentiality on sensitive files or something like that, to explain why I don't want other secretaries or a temp getting their hands on them." "They won't buy it," she said flatly. I sighed. "Probably not, but I can try." "Hold off for a bit." "Why?" I asked, realizing that I'd never considered that she might welcome a transfer. I'd just assumed she was as comfortable with our working relationship as I was, but perhaps not. Maybe she wanted to work for someone else, even if it was Follmer. "Well, he is a D.D., and that would be a step up for you. I'm sure there will be a salary increase involved," I said finally, unable to keep the hurt out of my voice. "No! Walter, you took that all wrong. That's not what I meant at all. I didn't mean hold off trying to find something on him. I mean just hold off requesting me back right away. Two reasons. One, they'll just think it's a pissing content between you two and they'll deny it on principle. Two, give me a few weeks. I may find out some useful things. Besides, I'd be willing to come by after my regular hours and help you out." "I can't ask you to do that, Kim," I said, secretly relieved that she did want to come back. "You could get into a lot of trouble." She merely smiled at me. "Nah, I won't get caught." "Famous last words." "I won't put myself in dangerous situations, but you know yourself, I hear things." "So you're offering to be my partner in crime?" I asked. "Yes, but I need some time to work my magic." "Ahh, all right then." I paused. "I don't like dragging you into this. Please be careful, Kim. He's a sleaze bag but he's also a powerful man. I don't want to see your career ruined over anything you're trying to do for me. This isn't your fight." "Yes, it is, as much mine as yours. I don't want to work for him. I want to work for you." "Even though I'm known for being a surly asshole with no heart?" I teased. She smiled. "You know about that, huh?" "I'm not deaf either," I deadpanned. She laughed out loud then and threw her head back slightly. She was absolutely gorgeous when she laughed and I found myself smiling again. I didn't usually smile this much and I had to wonder what it was about her that brought it out in me, this desire to smile and relax. "You're crusty on the outside, but you're a softy on the inside." "You think so, huh?" I asked, bemused at her ribbing. She smiled sweetly, her lips pressed together. "I know so," she said quietly. XXXXXXXXXX PART 2 (NC-17) FBI HEADQUARTERS HOOVER BUILDING WASHINGTON, D.C. TWO WEEKS LATER THURSDAY EVENING Kim knocked lightly and said, "Sir, I'm leaving now." I waved her in and she stepped into the office, closing the door behind her. She leaned against it, her hands behind her back, still on the doorknob. "Kim, I can't thank you enough for helping out. I'll make sure you get overtime pay." "That's all right, Sir. It's not like I have a life anyway. And the money never hurts." "This girl, Cindy, is sweet, but she's hopeless." Kim smiled. "She had trouble with the Access program." "Trouble? How could she have trouble? She couldn't even get into it!" I growled. Kim chuckled. "I showed her how. She's long gone, but I decided to enter the reports that were piled up because she couldn't get in. I got through about half of them. I'll try to get the rest tomorrow night." "You don't have to Kim, but I really appreciate it." "Any time, Sir. Glad to help out." "Good night, then," I said, wistfully, wondering what the hell I was still doing there at 7:00 PM at night. Then I realized I didn't have a life either. "You want to go to dinner?" I asked abruptly. She looked startled. "Oh, I'd love to but I'm meeting my mother in a half an hour." "Oh, all right," I said, surprised at how disappointed I was. I must have looked crestfallen because she said, "Can I take a rain check?" I smiled. "Of course." "I don't have plans tomorrow night," she said, actually acting shy. I felt my groin tingle and pressed my legs together, putting pressure on my genitals to stop the feeling. My God, was she blushing? "It's a date," I said, without thinking. She sucked in a little breath and squeaked out, "Oh." "I'm sorry, Kim. I didn't mean that the way it sounded. I'm your superior and ..." "You didn't mean it?" she asked, sounding disappointed. I was confused now. Did she want a real date with me? Impossible. I stared at her, trying to discern her feelings. Her face was in shadow in my dimly lit office and I couldn't see well enough. Roughly, I said, "I meant it about taking you out to dinner. It's not exactly ethical, since I'm your superior." "Not anymore, not technically," she countered. "No, I guess I'm not, huh?" I sounded sad, even to my own ears. She approached me slowly and stopped by the side of my desk. I swiveled in my chair to face her. She was so close and I could smell the scent of strawberries surrounding her. I inhaled deeply and without thinking, it slipped out. "You smell so good." She gasped and I stood up, leaning my ass against the side of my desk. I carefully reached out and put my hands on her shoulders, gently steering her in front of me until she was standing between my spread legs. She was staring at me, seemingly mesmerized by my actions. "What are you thinking, Kim?" I asked. I could feel a slight quiver under my hands where they still rested on her shoulders. I slid them inwards, nearly cupping her neck and touching her bare skin. She felt cool to my touch and she shivered, blushing again. "I'm thinking ... things I shouldn't be thinking," she said cryptically at last. I raised her chin up with two fingers and stared into her eyes. "What kinds of things?" I whispered. 'What the hell was I doing?' I wondered. This was very dangerous. She pressed her lips together nervously. "I'm not very good with men," she blurted out. I smiled gently. "You're fine with me," I said. "I'm ... I need to go," she said suddenly, jerking out of my grasp. I let her go and she stepped back but didn't leave. She seemed frozen on the spot, staring down at her feet. "Let me ask you this, Kim." "What?" she asked, unable to look up at me. "If I ever did ask you out on a real date ... would you want to go?" Her eyes jerked up to meet mine. She swallowed noisily and I found her nervousness endearing. "I think I would, Sir, but I'm ..." My heart began to race. Had she just said she would go out on a date with me? "You're?" I prompted. "I haven't really ever had a ... good relationship," she stuttered. "That doesn't mean you're not capable of it." She swallowed. "I have to go." "I didn't mean to pry or upset you," I said. "You didn't," she whispered. "I just have to go." She whirled and was gone in a cloud of strawberry scent. I inhaled again and closed my eyes, doing nothing this time to stop the burgeoning erection in my pants. It was going to a long night and now I was horny. Time for me to go home too. At least there I could jerk off and dream about having things I didn't deserve. XXXXXXXXXX SOMEWHERE IN D.C. I hated the drive home, especially after dark. My neighborhood was all right but it was within spitting distance of this neighborhood, which wasn't so good. I checked to make sure my doors were locked again and gripped the steering wheel tightly, seeing the drug dealers hanging out on the corner. "Get a grip, Kim," I whispered into the silence of the car. They leered at me, grabbing their crotches and I felt bile rise up in my throat, staring straight ahead and refusing to look at them anymore while I waited for the light to change. Finally it did and I gunned the motor, hearing their laughter through my closed windows. I relaxed marginally once I was moving. I hated stopping anywhere in this six-block radius. I went two more blocks and had to stop at another light. I looked to the left and there was Brad Follmer, like someone had conjured him out of a nightmare. He stepped out his Bureau issued Lincoln and looked around before locking it with his key fob. I heard it squeal, and watched him cross the street. I watched in my rear view window as he passed the rear of my car and entered the Grand Marquis Motel on the corner. Now, I'm not stupid. I knew the Grand Marquis was anything but grand. It was known for being used for shady deals and drug dealers conducting transactions. It was also known to rent out rooms by the hour. I began sweating as I realized I was going to follow him. I had to know what he was up to. This, I knew, would fall into the category of putting myself in a dangerous situation. I'd promised Walter I wouldn't do that. Walter. God, I was even calling him Walter in my mind now, rather than, Sir. That was a bad sign. What had all that back in his office been about anyway? Someone honked behind me and I realized the light had turned green. I made an abrupt right turn rather than going straight and circled around the motel. I found a small lot in back and parked. I took a deep breath and exited my car, throwing my purse over my opposite shoulder so it hung like a sash and I wouldn't have to hold onto it. I walked back to the front and ignored the wolf whistles from the deadbeats on the corner. I slid my hand into my pocketbook and located my Mace, gripping it tightly. I entered the lobby in time to see the back of a head exiting a side door off the lobby. I couldn't be sure but I thought I'd seen Follmer's blonde head. I wondered if he was meeting someone here, maybe some other member of Bureau that was less than ethical. I already knew he was into some shady deals. In the two weeks I'd been working for him, though, I hadn't been able to find any hard evidence that he was blackmailing anyone at the Bureau or members of various committees on Capital Hill. I went to the desk and an old, tired-looking man glanced up. He smiled and displayed his one snaggle tooth in front and receding gums. Charming. "Hi, um, the man that just came in here. Can you tell me which room he went to?" The man eyed me suspiciously, and said, "Who are you? You've never been here before." I took a deep breath and gave him my most winning smile. "I'm the new girl, and dummy me, I lost the piece of paper that told me what room to go to. But I'm supposed to meet him here and if I don't ... my ... boss ... will be really pissed off. Please, mister." He smiled. "Your boss, huh? Which pimp is yours, honey, Chico?" he asked, as if it wasn't illegal or unusual to have prostitutes in his hotel. My worst fears were confirmed. "Uh, yeah, something like that. Look, can you tell me or not? He looked down at a ratty notebook on the counter and said, "Second row of rooms out there. I just gave him a key, can't remember which one. Guess he's having a two-fer tonight, huh?" Then he cackled, spraying me with foul breath and whiskey fumes. I tried to smile but almost gagged and turned away. Over my shoulder, I said, "Thanks! I'll find him." I exited the side door I'd seen him go through and entered a parking lot on the other side of the building. Towards the rear was a structure that looked like row housing. These were the rooms. I stayed in the shadows as I crossed the parking lot, hearing the blood whoosh in my ears and my heart beat rapidly. 'I should call Walter,' I thought. I dug in my purse and realized I'd left my cell phone in the car. Damn! The structure was two stories, with a staircase on one side leading up to balcony walkway and a row of rooms on the second floor. I crossed the lot and approached the first door. I gingerly leaned forward and pressed my ear to it. Silence. I went door-to-door, listening for some sound and finding none. I climbed the stairs and started on the second floor row of rooms. Dirty glass windows that looked like they hadn't been cleaned in years adorned the front of each room next to the doors. Ratty curtains hung in each window. I looked down and saw light coming from the third room down. Just then, I heard a scream, "ARGHHHHHHHHH ... OH! FUCK YOU! THAT HURTS! It hurts. It hurts. It hurts!" Cautiously, I crept down the walkway and pressed my back to the wall next to the window. I could smell mold and old piss. 'Just more charming by the minute,' I thought. I took a deep breath and turned, glancing in the window. It was smudged and dirty but I saw him. It was HIM! And he was stark naked in profile. I shivered in revulsion as I felt the walkway swim under my feet. I moaned as I took in the sight and watched the scene unfold before me. I was frozen, feeling my heart pound against the wall of my chest and my hearing fade out. I closed my eyes, seeing light flash behind my lids. "Don't pass out, don't pass out," I whispered to myself, leaning my shoulder on the wall for support so I didn't keel over as I witnessed this atrocity. Oh God, I had to stop this, didn't I? By the time I got to the car and my phone he would probably be gone. 'Shit, shit, shit! What should I do?' I screamed internally. The young girl was bent over the end of the bed, her hands cuffed and her torso on the bed. Her leather mini skirt was shoved up around her waist and her tank top was shoved up under her armpits. Her panties were hanging between her knees. She looked uncomfortable in her spike high heels with her ass in the air. I winced and gasped as I watched his big hand come down on her ass, leaving another large red handprint on her white skin. Good Christ, how old was she? She was a prostitute? That's what the man at the desk had implied. Follmer must come here often to indulge his fetishes. Thanks to Walter, I knew that young women were one of them. I looked at the girl again, and realized I'd be hard pressed to call her a woman. She was a girl, barely out of puberty. I felt bile rise in my throat for the second time that night. This was crazy and dangerous. I knew I shouldn't be doing this. He was a powerful man, and if I was caught, I was in big trouble. She was a prostitute, after all. Then I blushed with shame at that uncharitable thought. I'm sure she wouldn't be doing this unless she had to. I heard her scream again and the world spun. I grasped the windowsill molding nearest me, pressing my chest into the wall and felt myself losing control. 'Not again, not here, oh please, don't let me lose it here,' I prayed. Too late. My head spun and I was having the mother of all flashbacks. XXXXXXXXXX WALTER SKINNER'S APARTMENT COLUMBIA HEIGHTS APARTMENTS 815 S GREENBRIER STREET ARLINGTON, VA 22204 I looked at the phone, feeling a strange, vague sense of unease. I'd called Kimberly to make sure she was all right. Silly, I know, but I was afraid she would be uncomfortable with me now and I didn't want that. I wanted to assure her that she didn't need to be nervous around me. When I didn't get an answer the first time, I didn't think much of it. She had said she was meeting her mother, after all. But now it was quite a bit later and I was starting to get worried. XXXXXXXXXX GRAND MARQUIS MOTEL ROOM 207 WASHINGTON, D.C. XXXXXXXXXX NC-17 PORTION XXXXXXXXXX I watched as he stripped her and then reached out and palmed the small cheeks of her ass again. He was so engrossed in what he was doing, he didn't even think to look my way. "Bruce ..." she whimpered piteously. 'Bruce?' Well I guess it made sense that he wouldn't use his real name. He was hard already, just looking at her red cheeks. His hands enveloped her tiny ass cheeks and squeezed hard. She squeaked and then he slammed his hand down on her ass again, watching her young, buoyant, flesh bounce and turn red with his handprint. "Oh yeah, baby," he moaned as I watched his cock inflate with more blood. He wasn't a huge man, but he looked like it towering over this child. I was wincing and flinching, feeling every blow and pinch as though it was happening to me. I realized tears had begun to pour down my face unchecked. He flipped her over onto her back and climbed on top of her body, biting her breast hard enough to leave teeth-marks in her pale flesh. He smiled, obviously loving that, watching her creamy skin turn red. She shrieked and began to pant, but otherwise did nothing. He kissed her neck and waited for her to relax, then he bit down hard on her neck. She wailed and her legs instinctively spread and lifted up in a defensive posture. He slid between them. His hips were pressing her thighs wide apart. He lodged his cock head at her entrance. I couldn't look. I squeezed my eyes shut and heard her scream in pain as he penetrated her. He thrust forward, jamming his cock into her tight, dry sheath and making her scream in pain. She was now whimpering and he was whispering filthy things into her ear that I couldn't make out. He got louder and louder and the words I heard made my stomach churn. "Oh, you hot little whore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Take that little girl. You like that? Oh fuck, you're so tight! Fuck me back, you little bitch. Move those hips. That's it, my little fuck toy. Grind me, yeah, just like that." He began to hump her like a mad man, harder and harder, ignoring her cries, enjoying her pain and came quickly with a final thrust upward into her poor abused body. I swallowed a sob, remembering the feel of gigantic hands pinching and squeezing my flesh, remembering the feel of being torn apart on a cock that was way too big for my small body to handle. I bit my lip so hard that I tasted blood. My knees were buckling and I turned to lean my back against the wall for support, waiting for my equilibrium to return. I took a deep breath and told myself I had to look. Peering in the corner of the window again, I watched him crawl off her and leave her there, crying. She wasn't going anywhere. I had to be able to recount these atrocities, even if I was incapable of stopping it. I should be able to stop it, I told myself; but again, my stepfather's voice rang in my head. 'If you tell anyone, I'll fucking kill you, you little brat.' He went to his duffel bag and extracted small elastic rubber ring about an inch and a half in diameter. He crossed the room, towards her and commanded, "On your knees, bitch." She scrambled off the bed, falling to her knees. Her hands were bound in cuffs and the metal was digging into her wrists. They were one more way to control her and cause her pain. He took a hold of the sides of her head and said, "You know what I want." She began to suck and he was soon growing hard again and groaning. I gagged involuntarily, remembering having it forced down my throat. The bastard. He'd nearly suffocated me. He yanked his cock out of her mouth and I snapped out of my memory hearing him say, "Stand up." He slipped what I now realized was a cock ring over his turgid erection and slid it down to the base. It would keep him hard for a long time. He grabbed her by her hair and threw her face down over the bed and the horror began again. XXXXXXXXXX "Move down to the end of the bed," he growled. "Bend over like before," he demanded. She did and he moaned at the sight of her on display. He walked up behind her and ran his hands over her cheeks. His thumb brushed the crinkled skin surrounding her anus, and she clenched instinctively. 'Oh no, he wasn't going to do that, was he?' I cringed. 'Yes, he was.' XXXXXXXXXX Without warning, I was back in my old bedroom, sprawled over the side of the bed, his whiskey breath wafting over the back of my neck making me gag. He chuckled, sounding evil as I felt his cock further engorge between the cheeks of my ass. He'd already come once, and the second time he lasted longer, prolonging my misery. God help me. He moaned in my ear as he palmed my ass cheeks. He loved to talk to me and scare me in the process, like I needed his words to be afraid! He bent over me putting his mouth to my ear. I was quaking with fright, dreading what was to come. He started rubbing his cock up and down my ass crack, making sure to press harder when he ran over my sphincter muscles, causing me to gasp. He'd never done this before. This was a new atrocity, a new low, even for him. "I'm going to fuck your little ass, baby. How 'bout that? Oh fuck yeah, I want you to take so much of my fucking cock up your ass that you beg me to stop." "Oh no, please don't!" I cried out, knowing my begging would be of no use. "Yeah, that's it. Beg me, little one. How much cock can you take, do you think? Think you can take the whole eight inches, baby?" "OH NO! You'll split me in two! Oh God, you'll kill me! PLEASE, NO!" I'd been sure I was going to die. "Oh, please ... YES!" he shouted, rearing back and plunging downward. He missed the mark, spreading me wide but bouncing away, causing a searing bolt of pain. He cursed I felt his cock hit my anus again and sink about two inches of his painfully huge cock inside my rectum. I shrieked in pain and stiffened. "Ahhhhh," I moaned, unable to do or say anything else as pain ripped up my spine. When I could move again, I'd tried to squirm away, grabbing the ratty bedspread and pulling myself forward. I screamed, "Mmmooommmmaaaa!" Couldn't she hear what was going on? Where was she? Why wasn't she coming to save me from this animal? "Oh no you don't, you bitch! You're going to take all of this cock, and no one's going to stop me, not even your momma. Don't lie, you little bitch. You're going to love it. I want you to feel it in your throat!" He didn't really care if I loved it or not. He grabbed a handful of my hair with one hand, standing on the floor, supporting himself with his other arm next my torso. He started to ram harder, punching himself into me in short, hard jabs. I shrieked, "OH, IT'S BURNING!" "Oh fuck, baby, yeah! Even tighter than your little, bald cootch." He kept it up, and I could hear myself grunting and letting out shrieks of pain as he tunneled his dick deep into my bowels. "Oh yeah, I'm gonna stretch your little intestines out and pack your shit hard, you little whore. "Oh, I fucking love this! YOU FEEL SO FUCKING TIGHT! SO FUCKING GOOD!" XXXXXXXXXX I slid down the wall, nearly passing out. A splinter jabbed into my hand from the rough clapboards and I winced, snapping out of my flashback. I realized those last words had come from Follmer and not from my stepfather as sagged under a wave of dizziness. Follmer's victim was sobbing now and her screams washed over me as he continued to pound into her ass. "AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, NOOOOOOOOOOO, YOU TORE ME, YOU SICK MOTHER FUCKER. I'M BLEEDING! PLEASE STOP!" Oh God, no, he was making her bleed. It would do no good to beg, I wanted to tell her. It never did any good. In fact, I think it made it worse. They wanted you to beg, it made them wild. It never did me any good, and it wouldn't do any good for her either. I gulped in a deep breath, feeling my anxiety ratchet up again as he pulled back and I could see the blood on his cock. Follmer gasped in pleasure, starting to thrust fully in and out, just leaving his glans inside and ramming back in as he slam-fucked her poor bowels. The worst was knowing you were being ripped apart and there was nothing you could do about it. Once more I sank into my nightmare. XXXXXXXXXX I was lost in my world of pain, reliving the nightmare that preceded my running away from home. My shrieking subsided and I just lay there sobbing as I felt my mind slipping away. "I want to see your face," he'd said to me. He yanked out suddenly and I gasped, renched back into reality by the pain. He grabbed my shoulder, rolling me over onto my back. He leaped between my legs, pushing behind my knees till they touched the bed next to my shoulders. He was nearly drooling as he said, "I love your hairless, little pussy." My crotch was red and swollen from the earlier abuse. Even still, I would have welcomed him taking me there again, instead of my ass. His cock stood up, streaked with my blood. I could feel blood trickling down into the crack between my cheeks and onto my low back. He positioned himself over me, and came up on his feet, carefully hovering over me. He pressed my knees into the bed, making my bottom pull up and suddenly I knew what was coming. He was going to do it again. "Ready baby?" he sneered, laughing. "No, please, no! Bruce, I'm begging you. No more!" Was that her or me pleading? I couldn't even tell anymore. He just smiled at me, plunging down, ramming himself deep into my ass. I cried out in pain and the tears immediately fell from my eyes. My bowels were raw from the fucking he was giving me. My body shook and spasmed while I moaned and convulsed and sobbed. I knew my tears and shouting excited him but I couldn't be silent. "Oh God, no! Please stop! Oh you bastard! Please stop!" He rutted like an animal, totally immersed in his own pleasure. His sweat was pouring down his face and falling all over my stomach and face. "Oh yeah, oh that's it, baby. Give me your tears. Oh fuck, you're a beautiful, baby whore. I love nailing you. Oh shit, oh shit. Look at your little quim pout every time I push in. Oh that's so sexy. Oh fuck, oh fuck. Look at your little face scrunch up in pain. I love that. I make you scream in pain. Jesus, I'm gonna cum so hard. You like it, don't you? You've asked for this for years. Flaunting your sexy little body in front of me, wearing those short shorts and tube tops. You're just begging to be fucked like the nasty, fucking, little anal whore you are. OH GOD, OH JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST!" he bellowed. His drunken rambling were almost as painful as his physical abuse. Somehow, I knew my body would heal, but how could I ever get his filthy words out of mind? Doubt clouded my thoughts. Maybe I was bad. Maybe I had worn clothing that was too revealing. Maybe that's why Momma didn't come to save me. Maybe I did deserve this. He came, bucking and gasping as he shot into my torn up bowels, squirting and gushing deep inside me. My mouth was open on a silent scream, tears streaming down my face, as his semen stung the torn tissues of my ass. XXXXXXXXXX I sobbed and surfaced from my waking nightmare. I was still feeling dizzy and tried to concentrate on what was happening on the other side of the window to keep me in the moment. He was coming inside her. Her mouth moved with every long drawn out ejaculation. I could see she felt the burn of every convulsion and glob of semen exploding inside her. I was right there with her. I had been overpowered by the intensity of my memories, cursing myself for my paralysis and my weakness. He moved both hands to squeeze her breasts hard, plucking at her bruised nipples. She cried out again, giving him what I knew an animal like him wanted. He pulled out, yanking his cock ring off over his still hard prick and drove into her again. He shouted, "Oh fuck, yeah!" Amazingly, he seemed to have ejaculated again, giving himself a second release right behind the first. XXXXXXXXXX END OF NC-17 PORTION XXXXXXXXXX She was crying in agony and I could do nothing to help her. I was frozen with panic and fear, seeing myself in her place and shuddering with the memories of my own long ago trauma. I felt sticky and gross, realizing I was sweating profusely and shaking like a leaf. "Come on, Kimberly, move. Come on, Kimberly, do something!" I chanted to myself quietly. Despite that, my feet were rooted to the floor, my eyes open wide as I watched him torture this small girl. I couldn't do a damn thing but shake. XXXXXXXXXXX He finally finished coming and backed away from her. "God I needed that," he said, flopping down on the bed, onto his back. The bastard glanced over at her and started to laugh. He really got off on hurting her as much as he did fucking her. He was even sicker than I had originally envisioned when Walter had told me of his fetish for young girls. Screwing teenagers was one thing, fucking to hurt them, regardless of age was another matter entirely. He and my stepfather were just alike, both sadistic bastards that loved to inflict sexual pain, reveling in it. I felt bile rise up in my throat and swallowed harshly against it, panting and trying to pull myself together. XXXXXXXXXX I swallowed again, summoning saliva to wet my mouth. I got control of my gagging, preventing myself from puking. My ass was cramping from clenching my anus in sympathy as I'd relived my nightmare. I realized the warm wetness between my legs was because I'd released my bladder as well. I touched my sex lightly through my slacks and trembled. It was wet and tender, as though it had happened yesterday. Now I was not only out here like an idiot all by myself, I was humiliated on top of it. I gathered myself enough to make my way back down the stairs and around the side of the building. My back to the wall, I slid down until I sat on the pebbly surface of scruff grass that lined the wall. It was pitch black here, but I could see the vague light from the front of the building. I was looking directly at the rear of the staircase. I could see between the steps and knew that I would see him leave. I watched with an eerie sense of finality. I hadn't saved her. I could have stopped him. I could have called out. I could have gone to get my phone. Instead, I stood frozen in a panic attack and relieved my own horror, allowing hers to continue. Silent tears rolled down my cheeks as I waited. I had to do something. It seems like hours, but was probably only minutes later. He tromped down the stairs, whistling to himself, his duffel bag slung over his shoulder. I nearly gagged, but managed to stay silent until he was out of sight. I staggered to my feet and stumbled out from the side of the building and up the stairs again, checking nervously behind my shoulder. The door was cracked open and I swung it in without thinking to knock. The girl sucked in a breath to let out a shriek and I held up my hands, frantically waving them over my mouth. She didn't let out the shriek, but eyed me warily. "I'm here to help you," I said finally. Her face was swollen and blotchy. Mascara was running down her cheeks. She had pulled her tank top on and sat otherwise naked on the bed. She laughed at me. It was a laugh without mirth and filled with pain. "Help me what?" she asked, still clearly confused. "Look I have connections," I babbled. "Who the fuck are you anyway?" Her street bravado was returning. "I work at the Bureau." "The Bureau?" "That man you were just with ... he's a powerful man. But he's not above the law. We need to get out of here." "Holy shit!" she exclaimed, finding her thong and mini skirt and yanking them on as I spoke. "Why are you here?" "I recognized him ... I followed him here. I suspected he was up to no good." "You're an agent?" "No, I'm an Administrative Assistant." She sighed. "Oh brother! "Look, I can help you ... please, get your stuff and come with me." "What'd you do, piss your pants?" she asked, waving her hand at my slacks. I blushed deeply and frowned. "Forget that," I said, completely humiliated. Surprisingly, she made no further angry remark. She nodded. "Why do you want to help me?" I met her gaze. "Because someone helped me once," I whispered. The girl and I stared at one another for several moments and then finally, defeated, she nodded at me. "Come with me. I know who can help us." "No cops, man. No cops," she said. XXXXXXXXXX PART 3 (PG-13) DANA SCULLY'S APARTMENT GEORGETOWN, D.C. 11:00 PM Ding dong. Ding dong. I listened to the bell reverberate through her apartment. "Oh please, Agent Scully, be home," I chanted to myself. I heard footsteps and her sleepy voice holler, "Just a minute!" I sighed in relief. Then her voice sounded again as she was unlocking the door. "Mulder, what the hell? It's 11:00 PM." She must have looked out the peephole before opening the door because I heard her sudden change in tone and voice. She was instantly alert, yanking the door open. "Oh Jesus, Kim!" I was standing behind the girl with my hands on her shoulders. "Agent Scully," I greeted her. "Kim, what happened? Were you in an accident? Who is this?" She swung the door wide to let us in. I steered the girl inside. "She needs medical help. Please help us," I said, suddenly realizing that I was waking a pregnant woman in the middle of the night. I didn't know who else to turn to, though. I couldn't deal with any men right now, even male doctors. Despite her advanced pregnancy, she took over like a Drill Sergeant. Dana Scully was the most competent women I'd ever known. I'd often wished I could be more like her. "You don't look so good yourself, Kim." "I'm sorry to wake you, but we needed your help," I whispered. "Don't worry about it," I heard her say as the room spun and then everything went black. XXXXXXXXXX GEORGETOWN MEMORIAL HOSPITAL GEORGETOWN, D.C. 12:00 AM I stormed into the Emergency Room and was approaching the desk when I saw Scully appear around the corner wearing scrubs. I veered from my trajectory toward the nurse's station and headed for her. A voice rang out, "Sir, you can't go over there!" Scully held up a hand to the nurse. "This is my boss, Cheryl, Assistant Director Skinner." "Oh ... all right then." She sat down heavily and I heard her mumble, "Weird fucking night." "What happened?" I growled at Scully. She looked bemused for a second and then said, "Kim showed up at my door about an hour ago. She had a young girl with her. She got her inside, said she needed medical help, please help her. Then she abruptly passed out on my living room floor." "Jesus Christ! Can I see her?" "Yeah, in a minute. I'm almost finished with her. "The girl was in bad shape, Sir." "Who's the girl?" "She's a young prostitute, Sir." She paused. "I had to do a rape kit on her." "A rape kit on a prostitute?" I asked. Scully frowned at my insensitivity and I felt chagrined, but my main concern was Kimberly right now. I shook my head. "Sorry, I'm just worried about Kim," I muttered. She nodded. "Sir, the girl is only 14 years old. She was brutally raped ... both vaginally and anally. Her rectum was torn ... badly. She's going to need minor surgery to repair the damage. "Holy Christ! How did Kim get involved in this?" "She followed the person that did this." "WHAT?" I shouted. Her face became stern and her voice brooked no argument. She looked me in the eye and said, "Sir, you need to calm down. Yelling at her about not acting wisely is not going to help her. She's very fragile right now and very upset." I took two deep, calming breaths. "You're right. Sorry to keep interrupting. What happened?" "She saw him park outside the Grand Marquis Motel on her way home and decided to follow him to see what he was up to. She found him and was able to ascertain what he was doing through the poorly maintained curtain on the window." "Who the hell would she follow? It's not like her to follow suspicious looking people just for the hell of it. What was she thinking?" Our eyes met. "She told me it was ... Deputy Director Follmer, Sir," she said quietly. "Oh my God! Kim, no!" I whispered harshly in surprise. "Can I see her now? Is she all right? The bastard didn't touch her did he?" Scully shook her head. "Sir, wait. There's something I think you need to know. And I wouldn't break Kimberly's confidence under normal circumstances, but ..." "Agent Scully, if you know something concerning Kimberly's safety, you have to tell me." "It's not really about her safety, Sir." "Then what is it?" "Kim was very shaken by what she witnessed." "Wouldn't anyone be? Thank God she didn't try to stop him." "Well, that's just it, Sir. She would have except that she panicked. She said she was paralyzed and couldn't move until it was over." "She's not used to seeing violent things, Agent Scully." She sighed. "I know that, Sir. However, I think ..." "Think what? Spit it out!" I was growing impatient, wanting to get to Kim. My concern was growing by the second. She met my eyes again. "Her exact words were, 'I was paralyzed by flashbacks.' I think Kimberly was raped in the past, Sir." I gasped. "Did she tell you that?" "No, but being paralyzed by fear upon seeing something like that ... as opposed to running away, does indicate a past experience with that type of violence. If she hadn't mentioned 'flashbacks' I might think differently and have assumed she was just afraid. This is more than fear." "That's not evidence." Scully sighed like I was a typical oaf of a man. "I know that, Sir. Please don't tell her I told you this. She's humiliated enough." "What?" I asked softly. "She lost control of her bladder, Sir. I let her shower and gave her dry clothes to wear. Now normally, Kimberly doesn't strike me as the type to panic and ... have that type of accident unless there is some sort of precipitating stressor." "You sound like Mulder." She smiled. "Be very gentle with her, Sir. If what I suspect is true, she's blaming herself for what happened." "Why would she do that?" "Because she didn't stop him," she said quietly. I felt my blood pressure rising steadily and I clenched and unclenched my fists. "I'm going to kill Follmer." "I'd hold off on that, Sir. Right now, your Assistant needs you to be understanding and very gentle." She smiled enigmatically at me and added, "And soft spoken." I hung my head. "She's not my Assistant anymore." Scully smiled softly. "Yes she is. She'll always be your assistant, Sir. She's in Trauma Room #2. I have to finish up with the girl in Trauma #1. I'll talk to you later." "Thanks for calling me, Agent Scully." "No problem." She turned and made her way behind the first curtain down the hall. I followed, seeing the #2 over the next doorway and cautiously tipping the curtain out of the way. "Kimberly?" She was lying on the bed with her head raised, staring off into space. I approached her and cautiously sat on the edge. I leaned an arm over her hips and put myself in line with her field of vision. "Hi," she whispered. "Hi," I replied. "How are you doing?" She looked away from me. "I'm fine." I winced, hearing Scully's brush off line, suddenly empathizing with Mulder. Women could be exasperating sometimes. "Agent Scully doesn't think you're fine. She thinks you were pretty traumatized out there." "Not there." "What?" "Never mind." I reached up and tucked a strand of errant hair behind her ear that had been laying across her cheek. She shivered. "I was so worried when Agent Scully called. I tried to call you earlier and was anxious when I didn't get an answer." "You did?" she asked. "Yeah. I'm glad you're all right, Kim. I was really scared," I admitted. "What made you do a foolish thing like follow Follmer anyway?" I asked lightly. She frowned. "Doesn't matter. I didn't do any good anyway." "Of course you did. You helped that girl. She's here now getting medical attention." "She needs more than medical attention," she said darkly. "We'll help her with that too," I soothed. I took her hand in between mine, sandwiching it and rubbing gently, not knowing what else to say. The silence stretched out as I watched a parade of emotions flit across her face. Finally, after a deep breath she spoke again. "I should have stopped it," she said softly. "I'm glad you didn't." She peered at me then. "How can you say that?" she asked, sounding surprised. "I didn't mean to imply I'm glad the girl got hurt, Kim. I just mean that Follmer would probably have hurt you if you'd interrupted whatever he was doing. I would never forgive myself if you'd been hurt, after I dragged you into this. This is entirely my fault." "You didn't drag me into anything. I walked in all by myself. Plus, you made me promise not to put myself in any dangerous situations. Obviously, I didn't listen very well." I leaned in and she stiffened slightly. I went ahead and brushed my lips lightly over her forehead. She relaxed and I remembered what Scully had said. Would my proximity bother her? It didn't seem to, but what did I know? "I should have saved her," Kim said again. I cautiously put my hands on her shoulders. Her thoughts had drawn her back to whatever hell she had experienced. I needed to bring her back to me. I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome after Viet Nam. I wasn't entirely unfamiliar with the symptoms. Flashbacks, Agent Scully had said, implying there was some trauma in her past. "I'll help the girl, Kim. I'll find a home for her, get her placed in one of the half way houses for women with counseling away from the city and the streets where she will be safe. Right now I'm concerned about you. Are you sure Follmer didn't see you?" "I'm sure." "I don't want you going home tonight and being alone. Can you stay at your mother's house?" "I need to be in my own house with my familiar things." I cupped her face and she shied slightly but then relaxed into my grip. "Will you let me come with you?" "Sir?" she asked, sounding bewildered. "I'd like to go home with you, Kim and spend the night on your couch, if that's all right." "He didn't see me," she insisted. "I know," I replied, although I wasn't convinced of that or that she was safe and Follmer was the only danger. "That girl probably has a pimp and when she doesn't report in, he could be a problem too. I don't want to take any chances. I don't want you to be alone right now." "I'll be fine," she said woodenly. "Kim, can you humor me?" I asked softly. "I'll just worry all night." She nodded. "All right." Her listless reactions were worrying me. I wondered if what Scully had said was true. Right now I wanted out of these glaring lights and to be at her place with her curled up in my arms. I didn't know if she'd let me do that though. We'd have to wait and see. XXXXXXXXXXX KIM COOK'S APARTMENT ALBAN TOWERS 3700 MASSACHUSETTS AVENUE, NW WASHINGTON, DC 20016 After making sure Scully got the girl admitted for treatment, Kim and I left for her house. Her car was still at Scully's apartment but we agreed to worry about fetching it in the morning. Scully assured me that they would keep Kelly Dunn, the young girl, for observation for at least twenty-four hours after her minor surgery. That gave me time to find a safe place for the girl. Fourteen years old. Jesus, my stomach turned just thinking about it. By the time I got Kim home, I was starting to worry about her lethargy. She wasn't snapping out of it. I asked her if she wanted to go to bed right away and she shook her head, sitting on the couch. "Can I get you anything?" I asked. She looked up and said, "I wouldn't mind a cup of tea." After rummaging in her cupboards for a bit I found the tea bags and put on the kettle to heat. Minutes later, with tea and sugar in hand, I returned to the living room and set her mug on the coffee table in front of her. She smiled gently at me, the first sign that she was coming out of her fog. "Kim, can you tell me what happened? Do you need some more time?" She shook her head and swallowed hard before speaking. "I was on my way home. I was stopped at a traffic light and ... I hate that damn neighborhood, but going around it would make my trip home take another twenty minutes. I just happened to see him park his car and get out. If he hadn't stepped up onto the sidewalk at that moment, I never would have noticed the Bureau Lincoln." I nodded, encouraging her. She explained that she had followed him inside, questioned the clerk, pretended to be a prostitute, which I couldn't imagine and then found his room. This is where it began to get a bit sketchy. Her voice climbed in pitch and confusion as she spoke. "I found him ... and she was so young. God, I saw them and I couldn't ... I should have stopped him ... but then I remembered ... and oh God ... he beat her and he was so rough with me ... her, rough with her and I was shaking ... and I wanted to ... but I couldn't ... and OH GOD!" she wailed. "I didn't do ANYTHING!" I wondered if she realized her slip when she said he was so rough with HER. She took a sip of her tea and her lower lip trembled. "I'm so sorry!" she cried out in a heated whisper. "For what, Kim?" I asked, sliding down the couch to be nearer to her. She looked at me incredulously. "I didn't stop him!" she gasped and tears started to run down her face. I wanted very badly to gather her into my embrace, but I was uncertain at this point if my touch would be welcomed. "Aww, Kim. It's all right. You did the best you ..." She cut me off. "No! It's NOT ALL RIGHT!" she wailed and hugged herself, wrapping her arms around her body. No longer able to stop myself from trying to comfort her, I slid her onto my lap, hugging her against me. She struggled for a moment. I whispered, "Shhh, I won't hurt you, Kim. Let me help you." Then she gave in, falling against my chest as she began to sob. "I ... I ... I FROZE! Damn it, Walter, I froze. I did nothing!" "Shhh," I whispered into her ear. I cooed nonsense to her until she brought her sobbing under control. Feeling her petite frame shudder against me as she sobbed was breaking my heart. She seemed so small and vulnerable at that moment. The Kim I knew was self-assured, confident and competent. Her words from earlier came back to me. She'd said she was no good with men. Scully must be right. There was something in her past that was clearly still haunting her. How did I get her to talk about it? 'Should I get her to talk about it?' I wondered. "Kim, listen to me a second." I lifted her chin with two fingers as she sat sideways on my lap. I was reclined against the back of her sofa, with one arm around her back, her shapely derriere planted in my lap. Any other time, this position might have excited me. Given the circumstances though, I was too concerned about her to get aroused. I couldn't deny though that the feel of her in my arms was divine, but my need to protect her from all the evils in the world overruled my desire for her. She brought out my protective instincts with a vengeance. I could kill Follmer with my bare hands for putting her through this. Fucking pervert. I couldn't wait to get my hands on him. He was finished. She peered up at me, her eyes red-rimmed. Her voice was ragged when she croaked out, "I could have saved her, Walter. I don't know if I can ever forgive myself." "Kim, I'm not saying she didn't need to be rescued. She did, no doubt. However, it's not your fault that she was in that position. It's not your fault she's a prostitute. It's not your fault that Follmer is a sleaze bag. Honestly, there's no telling what would have happened if you'd interrupted him." "She wouldn't have been brutalized." "You could have gotten both of you killed." She seemed startled by that possibility. "I don't think ..." "Kim, the man is evil, obviously. He's powerful and he hasn't gotten where he is by being a nice guy. The fact that he's even willing to take advantage of a girl so young tells me that he's not right in the head. A man like that would have no compunction about wasting the girl or you if he felt threatened enough. He could never let a secret like this get out. He'd be ruined." "Oh God," she whispered. "I didn't say that to frighten you. I'm not going to let anything happen to you. My point is that you are not responsible for this. You could have just as easily driven by, which would have been the sensible and safe thing to do." "But I didn't ... keep driving that is." "I know that and I'm so relieved you weren't hurt, I can't even tell you." She looked up at me now, wriggling slightly. She seemed to suddenly realize our position and was uncomfortable with it. She moved as though she would slide off my legs. I responded by sliding my arm down and touched her hip, hitching her up closer to me and settling her into the crook of my arm. "You're not going anywhere," I said softly. "I won't hurt you, Kim," I reassured her again. She smiled shyly at me and shrugged. Then she leaned her head down to rest on my shoulder. "Why are you doing this?" "Doing what?" "Coddling me." "I like coddling you," I said roughly, feeling my chest expand with warmth as her hand swept over the front of my shirt, picking at imaginary lint. "You must think I'm such a wimp," she said finally. "No, I think you're incredibly brave, Kimberly Cook." "Brave? That's a laugh," she chuffed out, clearly disgusted with herself. "Yes, brave. You were brave to follow him, brave to watch him, brave to approach the girl afterwards and take her to Agent Scully. You did all the right things, Kim. Because of that, the girl is going to get some help. I do have one question though." "What's that?" "Why didn't you call the police?" "I suggested that, but she freaked out. She was afraid of being arrested for solicitation. She begged me to keep the cops out of it. She was already afraid that I was law enforcement of some kind when I told her I'd followed him. She thought I was going to haul her in at first." "She's so young," I said. "Yeah, and I know this is going to scar her for life," she sighed. "Sounds like this isn't your first brush with abuse," I said gently. Her head lifted up to seek my face and I stared down at her. "How did you know that? Did Agent Scully say something?" "Not exactly. She just said you were traumatized beyond what she thought was normal for the situation. She suspected something wasn't right." "Well, I should be pissed, but somehow I can't be. Agent Scully was great, Walter. She just took care of everything. She's so strong, unlike me." "Hey, apples to oranges, Kim. You've got to stop this. Look, Scully's a medical doctor and a trained federal agent that packs heat. You're an Administrative Assistant, armed with ... what? Pepper spray?" "I know, but that's not really what I mean." "Kim, stop comparing yourself to Agent Scully. There is no comparison." "I know," she said sadly, taking it the wrong way. "No, Kim. I mean you are probably the stronger of the two." "How can you say that?" she asked with an incredulous look on her face. "Because if you've been abused in your past, then you had to overcome some heavy stuff to be able to get where you are today. That takes a kind of strength of spirit that a lot of people don't have, Kim. I hope to God that poor girl has your kind of strength." She was gazing at me now, her eyes pooling with unshed tears. I didn't want her to cry again. I hitched up on one hip, extracting my handkerchief and handing it to her. She wiped her eyes and then wrung it out between her fingers. "Can you tell me about it, Kim?" She looked down at her hands, seemed to realize what she was doing and stopped wringing her hands around my handkerchief. She handed it back to me and I simply laid it on the couch next to us in case she needed it later. She was quiet for a long time and I didn't think she was going to answer me. Then all of a sudden she began to talk. XXXXXXXXXX PART 4 (R) KIM COOK'S APARTMENT ALBAN TOWERS 3700 MASSACHUSETTS AVENUE, NW WASHINGTON, DC 20016 I felt so warm curled up on his lap. He was an enormous man. That was ironic, as big men usually intimidated me. Despite his surliness, for which he was well-known, Walter Skinner had never intimidated me. He was a lot of bluster and braggadocio. I knew he had to keep up a certain image for his agents. I, however, got to see the caring man underneath. As amazed as I was, I was certain that he had become interested in me as a woman. I don't think he realized the depth of this attraction until I was being taken away from him, but at least he had finally admitted it to himself. I'd been shocked when he mentioned a date and asked what I would do if he asked me out on a real date. My brain was so fuddled now, I couldn't even remember if I'd ever answered him properly. I don't think I did. Now, here I was curled up in his lap. I was mortified by this experience. I'd wet my pants for Christ's sake. Now that was humiliating. I hadn't had one of my panic attacks in ages. I'd hoped to never have one again. I guess that was too much to ask for. Now, he was asking me to tell him about my past. He suspected I'd been abused in some way. He wasn't pushing. I knew that if I refused to talk, he wouldn't push it. I also knew that for the first time in my life, I was feeling safe with a man. I looked up into his eyes, gazing at me now with such tenderness. If I wanted the relationship he'd hinted at, I would have to share my past with him. Better that he know about it up front. It would probably turn him off, like it had the few others I'd let get close to me. However, at least I would save myself the heartache of getting involved and having it collapse after I'd given my heart away. What did I have to lose? "You know something?" I began. "What?" "Big men usually intimidate me," I admitted. He smiled at me. "Do I intimidate you?" "No, that's the funny thing. I feel safe when I'm with you. I know you would never hurt me." "Not intentionally," he qualified. "I told you I wasn't good with men." "I wondered what you meant by that. I assumed you meant you'd had some bad relationships in the past." "That's an understatement. I need to tell you about my past." "You don't have to if you don't want to, Kim. If you're not ready, I'll wait until you are ready to share it. I admit I'm curious, but I realize you don't have any reason to tell me about it, really. "Yes, I do," I said. "You do?" he asked. "Yes." I stared at him. "If I want to have a relationship with you ... and I think that's what you were offering earlier ..." "It was," he said gruffly, now staring at me. "Then you have to know some things about me first." "I want to know everything there is to know about you, Kim." "Be careful what you ask for," I warned. He merely smiled. "My parents divorced when I was eight years old. It was just us for a while, Mom, me and my kid brother, Ryan. When I was twelve, she married my stepfather, Carter White." I felt him stiffening under me. He already knew what I was going to say. "You're going to tell me he ... I'll kill him." I held up my fingers to his lips. He nodded for me to continue. "He was an awful drunk and he just leered for years, but when I was fifteen ... he made his move. He molested me." She paused. "No, why sugar coat it? He raped me, repeatedly, in every way there is to rape someone. He threatened my brother, my mother, my friends, whoever he had to in order to keep me quiet. I put up with it for about a year but then I ran away." He was riveted now, staring at me intently. "Awww, Kim," was all he said. I couldn't look at him. I didn't want to see the disgust in his eyes, the look men got when they thought they were looking at a tainted woman. My mother called me 'used merchandise'. "My mother knew. She had to know, she had to hear us, and she did nothing. I hate her to this day for it. She was too weak to deal with it and convinced herself I had brought it on myself, I think. She was a drinker too, and she just fell into the booze right along with him." His fingers lifted my chin for the third time that night. I gasped slightly as I looked into his face. His eyes were soft brown and glowing with compassion. There was no disgust. His fingers left my chin and the backs of them brushed over my cheek like butterfly wings. I felt a warm shiver travel down my spine at that gossamer touch. "You were a runaway," he said slowly, with no hint of censure in his voice. "Yes. I lived on the streets for nearly a year. I was very close to selling my body for food money. I figured it couldn't possibly be worse than what I'd already endured. Somehow, I managed to escape that. There was this corner deli. The guy was a real cheapskate. "He would ask me to deliver sandwiches. He knew I was homeless and hungry. I would do it, my mouth watering the whole time, smelling the food. I was so tempted to just take off and eat it." "Why didn't you?" Walter asked quietly. "Because he promised me my own sandwich if I would make the deliveries for him." "Ahhh," he said in acknowledgement. "Every three deliveries, he would let me have a sandwich of my choice. I fed myself that way for months. I stole some clothes from the Salvation Army bin so I would look decent. I couldn't be delivering food dressed in rags. I slept in shelters most of the time. Between the soup kitchens and the deli, I was able to keep myself reasonably warm at night and fed. "Anyway, one day I was out delivering my last sandwich and I couldn't wait to get back so I could pick mine out. I lived on those sandwiches. If I got two in one day, which was rare, I would stow one away in my pocket for later. Anyway, I was heading out with the last and third delivery and there was this woman backed into an alley. She obviously was not from the neighborhood." He nodded for me to continue. "She was dressed in a red wool suit with a silk scarf. She had a pocketbook over her shoulder, was holding a briefcase. Her hair and nails were perfect. Funny, I remember noticing that. What the hell she was doing there, I didn't know. But three of the neighborhood boys had her trapped in the alley. It was obvious that they were after her purse, trying to rip it off her shoulder. Then they started getting rough with her, pulling her jacket open and ripping her blouse while I watched. "Oh shit," he muttered. "I knew what they planned on doing. I knew one of the three guys. We weren't friends or anything, but I'd seen him around the neighborhood numerous times. He was in a gang, I think, real tough guy. But I'd shared a sandwich with him one night when his mother had kicked him out of his house. We'd both been hungry. And then I showed him where he could get a bed for the night. He was new to the streets then. It's a weird thing. There's an odd code of honor on the streets. If someone helps you out, you owe them one." "What happened?" "I flipped. I had one of my flashbacks to being abused. Even though I knew she was stupid for putting herself in that position, I couldn't let them do it. I dropped my delivery and ran into the alley, screaming at them to leave her alone." "Oh my God!" "They turned on me, but then the guy I'd helped recognized me. He asked me if I knew her." "I said I did. She was a friend of my family's, and please leave her alone." "They listened to you?" he asked, clearly astonished. "Yeah, I lucked out. They took cash from her wallet , threw the purse at her and took off. The guy shouted, 'We're even.'" "My God, you were lucky." "I know. The woman was so grateful she fell all over me, crying." "What did you do?" "I got pissed." I chuckled at the memory. "I realized I dropped the sandwich I was delivering and knew I was going to catch hell from the guy at the deli. It was mangled. I was swearing up a storm, saying how I wasn't going to get my one meal that day cause I'd come to her rescue and what the hell was a professional lady like her doing in this neighborhood anyway." "What did she do?" "Well, it seems I chose the right person to rescue. She was an Assistant District Attorney." "No shit!" "She was in the neighborhood to visit a client, got lost and made the mistake of getting out of her car to ask directions." "Is this where things get better?" "Yup. Her name was Nancy Nolan. She buttoned up her jacket, walked me back to the deli. She told him what I'd done. He didn't care of course until she cussed him out and threatened with a spiel on child labor laws that made him go pale. Then she bought me two sandwiches, calling him a cheap bastard and we walked out of there. I never delivered another sandwich." Walter laughed now. "Then what happened?" "She took me to a shelter and promised to return. Of course, I didn't think I'd ever see her again." "But you did?" "Yes, I did. She came back the very next day and took me downtown. I was made a ward of the State. Turned out that one of her ex-clients was a foster mother who took in State kids. She said I could trust her. She arranged for me to stay with her until I turned 18. I was with her for two years." "Wow. That's quite a story. How did I go seven years and never know all this about you?" "Don't know," I murmured. "That's not the end of the story, I take it." "No, her friend's name was Adrienne LeBlanc. She was a sweet lady. She helped me get my GED, and then I started working at a flower shop, saving my money. She got the State to pay for counseling for me, which helped tremendously. She got them to help me with tuition too and enrolled me in Junior College. I went to school for two years, got my Associates Degree as an Administrative Assistant and the rest is history." "You were never arrested, obviously." "Nope. Couldn't have gotten into the Bureau if I'd had a record." "Right. Was the Bureau your first job?" "No. I worked for a couple of businesses as a secretary and then a friend told me about the opening at the Bureau for the secretarial pool. On a whim, I decided to apply. They had tuition reimbursement so I went on to get a Bachelor's Degree in Secretarial Management. After about a year, the job to be your Administrative Assistant came along." "And the rest is history." "And the rest is history," I repeated. "I'm glad you did," he replied. I looked up at him and my breath caught in my throat. The look on his face was thrilling. He wasn't appalled by my background, my molestation, my prior status as a runaway. "Walter ..." "You are so brave, Kim, overcoming all that adversity. I admire you for it." I shrugged. "Most people look down on you when they know you come from the wrong side of the tracks." "Then they're idiots. That's all I can say. You are so warm and caring. I can't believe you're not bitter." "I am sometimes," I admitted. Our gazes met and locked and he said, "You're so beautiful, Kim, inside and out. God, you're so beautiful to me." I gasped, surprised by his admission, despite knowing that he was at least a little attracted to me. Hearing the words from my rough, tough boss had a startling effect on me. I felt myself grow soft and moist. God, I wanted him to kiss me. His lips drifted closer, moving slowly and giving me time to pull away. Finally they reached my own, brushing lightly. Again, I gasped softly and he pressed his lips to mine. He was not demanding or harsh. He was asking permission. I opened my mouth and pressed back, giving him a green light. He moaned softly and worked my lips back and forth slowly. The kiss was slow and gentle, but thorough and erotic. I was panting slightly, wondering that I wasn't panicking, especially after all I'd been through tonight, having all the memories come flooding back. He pulled back and whispered. "I don't want to scare you." "You don't scare me," I teased. He smiled. "You've had a rough night." "Yeah, I have." As if to confirm it, I yawned widely and covered my mouth with my hand. "Oh geez, I'm sorry," I apologized. He chuckled. "Don't worry about it. Let's get you in bed." I looked at him raising one eyebrow. He chuckled. "I'll bunk on the couch." "Such a gentleman." "Let's take it slow, Kim." I nodded. "I agree." XXXXXXXXXX FBI HEADQUARTERS HOOVER BUILDING WASHINGTON, D.C. A.D. SKINNER'S OFFICE FOUR WEEKS LATER After much discussion, we decided not to turn Follmer over to the police. Walter convinced me that he would rather use this to get me back into his office and away from him. Keeping me safe was his top priority, and he knew that holding this over Follmer's head would be a great advantage and keep him in line. He didn't trust that Follmer's connections wouldn't be able to spring him out of jail if he was arrested. There was no doubt he would come after me if he knew I'd turned him in. Somehow he managed to convince Follmer that he had 'friends' who had investigated his activities and had been able to keep my name out of it totally so he didn't suspect my involvement in his downfall. I was now back where I belonged, working for Walter Skinner. He'd been the perfect gentleman, as always. We'd gone out on several dates, sometimes to dinner, sometimes to a movie. Once he'd cooked dinner for me at his place. A kiss was all he had asked for, never pushing me for anything else. I knew he wanted more. I had felt his arousal several times during those kisses good night, which had become increasingly hotter and more passionate each time. We were the picture of decorum at work, never letting on that we spent time together outside the office. The other thing Walter was afraid of if we turned him in, was him using his own connections to have the girl hurt or threatened. The girl had refused to talk to the police, but Follmer didn't know that. Although I didn't think he was paying for his crimes, Walter assured me that he would pay. A week ago, I had passed Follmer in the hall and he'd had a split lip. I'd had to resist the urge to run to our office and ask Walter about it. I had hurried into his office looking frantic. When he saw me, he'd stood up, asking, "Kim, what is it?" "Tell me you didn't do it," I said. He'd frowned. "What are you talking about?" "Follmer ... he was beat up. He has a split lip. Tell me you didn't do it." He'd smiled and said, "No, I didn't do it." "You're smiling. You know something about it." He nodded. "I have some confidential informants that I use." "And?" I asked. "And I casually let it slip that he was the one that had taken the girl off the streets, hoping to have her all to himself." "Oh no." "I guess word must have gotten back to her pimp. That's a shame," he said, clearly unrepentant. "Walter ..." "He couldn't get away with it scot-free, Kim. You said so yourself." "I know, but ..." "I know you hate violence. I'm sorry about that. However, he needed to be taught a lesson. He needed to find out that there are people in the world just as evil and even more powerful than him, and that he isn't above the law. Since I couldn't turn him in without risking repercussions to the people I love or his innocent victim. I had to find some other way to make him pay." I swallowed harshly, stuck on one part of his comment. "The people you love?" I whispered. He smiled widely then and stepped into me, reaching around and shutting the door behind me. His arms then slipped around my waist and he pulled me gently against him. "Yes, the people I love. Or should I say, the person I love the most in the whole world?" "Walter, oh my God!" I exclaimed in a breathy tone. He just smiled a smug smile and leaned down, kissing me gently. "I love you, Kimberly." "How can you ...?" "Shush. We'll talk later. How about you come over for dinner tonight?" I nodded. "All right," I said softly. I knew he was waiting for me to return the sentiment. I did love him, but I was so scared. I couldn't bring myself to commit just yet. He smiled sadly, realizing I wasn't going to make my admission now. "Kim ..." he began. "I'm sorry, Walter. I don't know why ..." "Shhh, it's all right. I'll see you for dinner, all right?" "Yeah, for dinner," I repeated. I then turned and went back to my desk, my head reeling from this new information. Oh my God! He was in love with me. He loved me. It seemed impossible. Being attracted to me was enough of a surprise. Being so gentle and understanding had been an even bigger surprise. Nonetheless, I'd gotten used to the idea that he was sincere in wanting a relationship with me, despite my past. But love? I hadn't counted on that, not this early in the game. We'd done nothing but kiss, for God's sake! I hadn't even slept with the man and he was telling me he loved me. Somehow though, that gave even more credence to his admission. If we had been intimate, I might've wondered if he was merely in love with sex, and had confused the two. I knew that couldn't be the case here. I knew he wanted to sleep with me. He'd made no secret about that. He'd also said that I would set the pace, and I should let him know when I was ready. He wouldn't push. He would wait for me. I felt a lump form in my throat as I realized how patient and kind he had been with me. Most men would have split by now, figuring I was too much trouble and effort. He loved me. I shook my head in wonder and tried to concentrate on my work. I had a feeling I wasn't going to get much else done for the day. I couldn't wait for dinner. Later that afternoon, Kelly called me to say she was being placed in a foster home. The man and woman she was being placed with seemed nice and had one other child, a boy near her age. She was thrilled. They lived in Maryland and had two acres of land and owned dogs. She sounded like a child of fourteen should sound and my heart lightened at the sound of her happiness. I knew that she would need years of therapy to overcome her trauma. It had taken me years of therapy, and even then, look what had happened to me the night she was brutalized. It was a start though, and I knew I had one more thing to thank Walter Skinner for. This had all been his doing and his connections. He'd promised me he would take care of it and he had. Was there anything wrong with this man? There must be, but right now, I couldn't think of a thing. XXXXXXXXXX PART 5 (NC-17) WALTER SKINNER'S APARTMENT COLUMBIA HEIGHTS APARTMENTS 815 S GREENBRIER STREET ARLINGTON, VA 22204 I arrived promptly at 7:00 PM and we ate a leisurely dinner of chicken, corn and mashed potatoes. He really was a decent cook. We sat on the couch afterwards, sipping on white wine. He pulled me to him and fitted me into the crook of his body, his arm draping over my shoulder. I sighed in contentment and he chuckled softly. "Full?" "Mmm, I feel so relaxed right now. Dinner was delicious." "Glad you liked it. It wasn't anything special." "It was special to me because you cooked it." He chuckled again. "Do you want to talk, Kim?" I stiffened slightly but then forced myself to relax. "Yeah, I guess we should. I know I froze in the office today. I hope I didn't hurt your feelings." "No, I know this is all tough for you. Trusting me isn't easy, is it?" "Trust has never been easy when it comes to men, but with you, it's been a lot easier than I thought it would be." "You trust me?" "Yes." We set our glasses down and he hauled me into his lap so I was straddling his legs. His hands skimmed up and down my arms, causing goose bumps to travel in their wake. "Do you trust me to never hurt you?" he asked quietly. "Yes. You've been wonderful, Walter, and so patient. I know I've kept you hanging longer than most men would be willing to wait." He shrugged. "You're worth waiting for, Kimberly Cook." I smiled at him and leaned close to his lips with mine. "I think I'm ready," I whispered. Then I kissed him. He grunted softly but received my kiss, moving his lips languidly over mine in a sensual and thorough kiss. He moaned slightly in the back of his throat and broke the kiss. "Are you sure? I don't want you to feel rushed." "I don't feel rushed or pushed, or anything of the sort. You've been nothing but kind and patient with me." "If at any point, you want to stop, you let me know, all right?" "I will." I paused. "Make love to me, Walter. No one ever has." I watched him swallow noisily, his Adam's apple bobbing. "I promise I won't let you down. I have protection in my wallet," he added. "I know you won't let me down. I'm on the pill to control my periods, so you don't need a condom. You're clean, right?" "Yeah, I'm clean. I love you, Kim. I know you can't say it back right now, but I need you know that. I love you." I put my fingers to his lips. "I know you do ... and I even believe you," I added. He smiled under my fingers. I took a deep breath, deciding this was my one chance for happiness with a man and I wasn't going to let it slip away. "I love you too, Walter," I whispered. It was barely audible to my own ears, but he heard me. His eyes became suspiciously wet. "Oh God," he whispered back. "You're so beautiful. I know how hard that was for you." I nodded. "You love me?" "You know I do." "Then show me." He grinned then and stood up, his arms around my waist. My legs wrapped around his hips and I clung to him as he walked us into the bedroom, setting me gently on the edge of the bed. The undressing was seductive. He removed my blouse, slacks, bra and panties, kissing his way over each portion of exposed skin as it became available. I was panting and humming with pleasure by the time he stood and undressed himself. I stared at his magnificent body, feeling a small tingle of apprehension when I realized how big he was all over. But he smiled at me, having seen something in my eyes, I guess. "I won't hurt you," he whispered. XXXXXXXXXX NC-17 PORTION XXXXXXXXXX He removed his glasses and tossed them on the nightstand and then crawled into bed naked, sliding up against me. The shock of feeling his skin against mine for the first time was nearly overwhelming and I gasped. He backed away quickly and asked, "Are you all right. We can stop any time, Kim." "No, I'm all right. I was just startled at the way it feels." He smiled and eased himself back towards me as we lay on our sides facing each other. I used his bicep as a pillow for my head. He leaned down and we began make out like a couple of teenagers, not that I'd ever had the pleasure of that particular teenage right of passage. After long minutes of kissing, he moved down my neck, suckling gently on the pulse near the base and squeezing a long, drawn out moan from the back of my throat as I felt my sex flood with wetness and desire. His hand snaked up my thigh, rubbing gently and inching closer to my juncture. He paused there near the top of my thigh, gauging my mood. I smiled and nodded at him. His hand slid slowly between my legs, his fingers brushing through my pubic hair and swiping over my entrance. He broke the bubble of wetness that had accumulated there and my seam slipped open, flooding his hand with my arousal. He moaned and kissed me deeper, one finger snaking inside. I gasped and he bent down, taking my nipple gently in his mouth. He licked it and suckled it gently, never being harsh or sucking too hard. I felt tingles race up and down my spine. I'd never been this aroused and found myself saying so. "Oh God, Walter. This feels incredible. I've never felt this before!" He smiled and kissed me again, nudging my legs open wider and moving between them. He supported his weight on his forearms and knelt on his knees, continuing to kiss me, taking his time. I was nervous. I wanted to give him as much pleasure as he was giving me but I felt clumsy and inadequate. I tentatively reached down and wrapped my hand around his shaft. I gasped at how hot, hard and silky it was at the same time. He moaned and broke the kiss, his head burrowing into the crook of my neck. "Oh Jesus, Kim." I swallowed. "I want to make you feel good too," I said quietly, feeling like a complete idiot. "You are," he said. "Tell me what to do," I hiccupped, feeling like a pathetic fool. He raised his head and looked at me with such tenderness I thought I would cry. Instead I blinked rapidly, waiting for him to tell me. "Do what feels right, Kim." I shook my head, frustrated that he didn't understand. I had no experience with this. "When I said no one had ever made love to me, I meant it," I blurted out. His face softened even more. "You mean you haven't had sex since you were ..." he broke off, not wanting to say the word. I nodded but looked away, feeling stupid, even more so because I was still holding his shaft like a frozen idiot. "I was a virgin when ... and now I need you to tell me what to do, Walter. I don't want to make a mistake. God, I'm so pathetic." "Aww, Kim. Aww, baby, it's all right," he cooed as I let go of him and started to cry. He slid off to the side and held me gently for several minutes, until my tears dried up. "I'm sorry. I'm ruining everything, aren't I?" "No, honey, you're just being honest and that's great. I'm sorry I didn't know. I know you said you weren't good with men, but I thought you meant you'd had bad relationships." "I did, and when I wouldn't sleep with them, they'd dump me. I never got this far. I must seem like such a dork to you." He smiled and wiped my tears with his thumbs. "You're beautiful, Kim. I'll teach you. Everyone is different anyway and you need to learn what you like and what I like. That takes time. Stop beating yourself up. In fact, it kind of tickles my ivories that I will be the first guy to make this a good experience for you. Hell, I'll be your first real 'lover'. I want to replace all the bad memories with good ones." I sniffled and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. He gripped my wrist gently and brought it down between his legs. I gasped as he wrapped my hand around his shaft. It had deflated some, but wasn't totally soft. I hadn't entirely killed the mood, but he was no longer as excited as before. He said quietly, "Just grip it gently at first and stroke up and down." I looked down between us and began to stroke my hand up and down from the tip to the root and back. I gasped as I felt him instantly harden in my hand. He moaned softly. "Yeah, just like that, Kim." Encouraged I stroked a little faster. He grunted and flexed his hips toward my hand. "Now grip it a little tighter, baby. Start gentle but then grip a little harder." I tentatively gripped him a little harder, feeling it pulse against my palm and stroked up and down again. He groaned and that encouraged me. I saw a drop of precum appear on the head of his shaft. I knew what it was and was fascinated by it. Without thinking, my thumb reached up and I spread it over the helmet of his shaft. He groaned again. "Oh yeah, Kim. That feels so good." I would have thought he was humoring me but the evidence was pulsing in my hand. I smiled up at him and he lowered his face to kiss me again. "Should I take it in my mouth?" I asked. From what I'd heard, men loved that. He hummed in his throat and rolled between my legs again and moved my hand from his shaft around to the back laying it on the muscular cheek of his ass. "We'll do that some other time. Let's stick to the basics tonight." I put my other hand on his other ass cheek. He whispered, "Squeeze them a little." I did as he asked and he kissed me harder, moving down to lay the weight of his lower body against mine. I moaned into his mouth feeling myself grow warm and wet between my legs again. He nudged my entrance with his shaft and I automatically stiffened, feeling a sudden wave of panic as he towered over me, blocking out all the light. He felt it and stopped immediately. "Relax, Kim. I'm not gonna hurt you." "I know," I whimpered. "I can't help it. He was always towering over me," I squeaked. "I could never see anything. I felt like I couldn't breathe!" Understanding dawned on his face and he rolled off to the side. I was ready to start crying, thinking I'd ruined everything again. Then he said, "Come here, Kim, straddle me." My eyes widened and I looked at him, lying on his back. "What do you mean?" He smiled, "I mean straddle me. You be on top. That way I'm not towering over you, and you have more control." "I've never thought about doing it like that before," I admitted, feeling shy but incredibly aroused. "That's all right. It's time for you to learn new things anyway. We can work around your fears until you're more comfortable. It's all right, baby. "I haven't ruined everything?" "Not at all, come here." I crawled over to him and slowly straddled his hips, putting my hands on his shoulders to hold myself up. His rigid shaft pressed into my wetness and stuck out between my legs against his stomach. He smiled and raised his hand to my breasts, tweaking my nipples gently and squeezing the mounds, making me melt with warmth and arousal again. "Oh God," I whispered. One of his hands slid down my belly and gently swiped across my clitoris, making me jump at first, but then shiver with excitement. I pressed into his hand and he chuckled. I blushed, surprised at my own brazen behavior. He didn't seem to mind though. He put his hands on my hips and moved me back to his thighs, exposing his cock. Then he put my hand on it again and I stroked it like he had shown me before. He threw his head back and moaned. He stopped me and put my hand back on his pecs and then rested his hands on my waist. He said, "You sit down on me when you're ready, Kim. Go at your own pace." I began to shake slightly with nervousness but I was determined. I needed to do this; I wanted to do this. If I couldn't do this with Walter, the man I trusted more than anyone in the world, and who loved me, I would never be able to do this at all. I reminded myself that he promised not to hurt me. I picked up his shaft and positioned him against my dripping wet lips. He sucked in a breath and said, "Yeah, move it back and forth a little. Get used to the feeling." I did what he said. He seemed more comfortable in the teaching mode now, easily telling me what to do next. It calmed me, knowing I was simply doing what he wanted me to do. I trusted him and I was used to following his instructions and this felt natural. I rubbed his head back and forth in my wetness, feeling my arousal flare a little higher. I stopped, took a deep breath and pressed down very slowly. I stiffened at the feeling of his head spreading my lips open, but I took another breath and forced myself to relax. I sank down until just his helmeted glans popped inside. We both groaned. "Oh God, Kim." "Oh, oh, oh geez," I whimpered, anticipating pain. "You're doing good, Kim. Relax. You're all wet and ready for me, baby. Don't worry. It's not going to hurt." It dawned on me then that he was right. I'd never been this wet before, ever, not even from making out or dreams or anything. My only experience with sex had been violent, fearful encounters and I'd always been dry as a bone and scared; never relaxed, never wet and ready to receive a lover. This was different. I was wet and aroused. He was letting me have control. This was going to be totally different. "Trust me," he whispered. I nodded and looked down again, still holding him with one hand, bracing myself on the other. I took a deep breath and let my legs relax, my own weight pulling me down onto his shaft. His thickness cleaved my lips open and he sank inside, butting up against my cervix. He had slid in smoothly and easily. Although I felt VERY full and stretched, it hadn't hurt at all. I was panting and sweating and just sitting there. I realized I should probably be moving. I looked down at him and he smiled. "Don't rush. Let yourself get used to the feeling. It didn't hurt, did it?" "No, it feels good," I said, hearing the astonishment in my own voice. He chuckled and flexed his hips up, moving his shaft inside me and I gasped, "Oh!" It sent tingles of sensation rushing from my clitoris through my vagina and I felt my muscles tighten around him in response. "Oh Jesus, Kim. You feel so good." "Yeah?" I asked, needing confirmation. "Oh yeah, baby. It feels so good." I liked that he was calling me pet names. It made me feel cherished and loved, something that was totally foreign to me. Knowing I was making him feel good gave me the little bit of confidence I needed to make the next move. I carefully raised myself up a couple inches, gasping at the sensation and then sat back down again. He groaned his hands going to my ass cheeks and gripping them firmly but gently. "That's good?" I asked. "Oh yeah. Just like that, Kim. Ride me, go up and down at your pace. Lift a little higher if you can." I did, lifting up further than before and moaning as I sank back down, shocked by the sensations racing through my body. My breasts were aching, and my crotch was hot and throbbing from the sensations. He began to thrust very gently and I matched him, posting up and down, lengthening my strokes as we both groaned and gasped. I couldn't believe how good it felt. He coaxed me on with gentle encouragement. "Oh yeah, just like that. Perfect, Kim. Oh you're so snug. Feels great. You're sexy, baby. So sexy. A little higher now, perfect. Oh God, a little faster." He guided me with his hands on my hips until I found my rhythm. Then he moved his hands to my breasts, playing with them and making me whimper with arousal. He pulled me down toward him and suckled a nipple into his mouth. I went completely nuts then. I was on fire and I began bouncing up and down on his shaft. I couldn't believe it. It felt so damn good! He broke the suction of his mouth, licked my nipple with the flat of his tongue and then howled, "Oh God, Yes, Kim, Yes!" Seeing him lose control was so empowering, knowing my actions were making him feel so good. His hand dropped to where we were joined and pushed my clitoris against his shaft. Two more strokes and I felt my walls quake against his thick shaft. "OH MY GOD, WALTER, IT'S SO GOOD!" I screamed. I was having an orgasm. I couldn't believe it. Not only had he not hurt me, he'd made me have my first orgasm that wasn't caused by my own hand. Even my skills at periodic masturbation were limited and orgasms had been few and far between. Nothing had ever felt like this. He grunted. "I'm gonna cum, Kim," he croaked. "Oh yeah, baby. You're gonna make me cum!" "Yes!" I shouted. "Do it, Walter. Come for me!" He howled an unintelligible sound and I felt him pulse deep inside me and then warm, wetness flooded my insides as my spasms gently died away. His face contorted with pleasure and he shouted, "Oh God, I love you, Kim." XXXXXXXXXX END NC-17 PORTION XXXXXXXXX I collapsed onto his chest, breathing harshly. He was panting as well. His arms came up to wrap around my back and held me in place. I felt him slowly deflating inside me. I felt warm and sated and safe. Then I began to cry. He held me quietly while I let my tears fall on his bare chest. He rocked me gently and cooed nonsense to me. I clung to him but finally calmed down and rasped out, "I'm sorry, Walter." "That's all right. I'm sure this is all overwhelming. Lots of firsts for you." "Yeah. Thank you for making it such a wonderful experience." "You're welcome. I hope it will always be a wonderful experience." "If I'm with you, I'm sure it will be. I have a lot to learn." "And I'll be happy to teach you. You're all mine now. You know that don't you?" he teased. I lifted my head off his chest and smiled at him. "I wouldn't want to belong to anyone else." "You don't belong to me, Kim. That's not what I meant. You belong WITH me, by my side, at work and in our personal lives." "I know. I'll learn, I promise." "Don't worry about it. There's lots of ways to make love and I'll enjoy showing you every one of them." "I'll enjoy having you show me," I said cheekily, feeling giddy all of a sudden. He laughed and kissed me on the nose. "Let's shower and then we'll bed down for the night. You are staying, aren't you?" "I hope so," I said. "I don't think I can walk very well right now." He chuckled again. "Come on, beautiful, let's shower." I grinned at him. "I love you, Walter." "I love you too, baby," he said sincerely as his soft, brown eyes gazed down at me. "This is like a miracle to me," I said quietly. He met my gaze. "You're like a miracle to me too, Kim. I love you so much." "Good, cause I'm not going anywhere now. You're stuck with me." "I wouldn't want it any other way." We kissed again and I ended up falling asleep. Guess a shower could wait until morning. xxxxxxxxxx I gazed down at her as she slept, sighing in contentment. I knew how she hated violence and so I would not tell her that I was trying to find Carter White. I wanted to know if the man was dead or alive. If he was alive, I planned on paying him a visit. There was no way he was going to go unpunished for what he had done. All that could wait though. Right now, I had a more important task, cuddling Kimberly while she slept. THE END.